I am insane. I’m so scared. What was I thinking??? I can’t do this!
That’s what I was thinking that first day to crossfit. But, there was something way deep inside me that was excited. Crazy excited, if I was really honest. Could I really develop into a person who was strong, active, and fit?
Once I shared my fears with my co-workers, I found out I wasn’t alone. Everyone was nervous at some level – well, except those crazy people who were already bought in (Buzz, Erin, Blake, Kyle, Doug – I’m sure there were others). But, I’m not them. But could I be?
Several weeks later, and we are still going strong (ok, strong may be a bit “strong”, but I’m moving). The coaches there are incredible. Even though I can’t yet see myself as being truly successful, my coach does. He believe in me. He is so proud of me that I’m JUST SHOWING UP! Oh yeah, when I “show up”, he pushes me. He pushes me HARD. But he never yells at me in anger or frustration. His “yells” are works like – Come on, you can do this! Don’t you give up! You’ve got this! Only 5 more minutes!
Yeah, if I were honest, I would like to tell him to shut up. I cannot do this! And then he yells again – YOU ARE AWESOME!!!! Seriously? Someone thinks that out of shape, overweight me is AWESOME?
Crossfit is a world of limitless opportunities. And I’m the one determining my own direction. My coaches, both at crossfit and Xceligent, will help me forge a path to get there, but I determine where I want to go.
Where am I going? Those thoughts of fear and insecurity are going to be gone by the end of this year. I am going to be strong and determined. I am going to be the one encouraging the next newbie that they, too, can do anything.